Motherhood

Before I had children I used to wonder what it would be like.

Of course you know that you will love them but truth be told..

You have no idea. None really, of the sheer depth of emotion that takes you the moment that baby is in your arms and never lets go.

The emotions gradually give way as life goes on and the monumental task that is "raising children" begins.

Oh the emotions are there, they may fade to the background but they never really disappear. With every wonderful first....

The first real smile, first laugh, first step, first words..... Oh to hear your baby say "mama"!

But, before you know it, the mundane tasks associated with child rearing have a way of becoming work rather than a joyful process.

After all, not so much joy in a screaming tantrum when you are four deep at the grocery check out with two weeks of food to be purchased. Did I mention the migraine that can sometimes accompany the tantrum?

Nothing joyful about loaded diapers, spit up, and runny noses.

Then it's on to the elementary years of gymnastics, swim lessons, cub scouts, Little League, PTA, science projects, book fairs, teacher gifts, fund raisers, .....

Suffice to say that for years your life is a little chaotic to say the least!!

Then come the teen years....

Those scary teen years that the very thought of is enough to make even the most confident of us quiver right in our mini vans or for the really cool moms SUV's

Because after all we were all teens once ourselves.

Joy, Fear, Anger, Love, Hope, Doubt, FRUSTRATION!

Every emotion known to man will be woven together with all the sheer hard work, blood, sweat, and tears that make up motherhood to form a beautiful tapestry that is your life.

I love my tapestry.

It is heavy, it is complex, it is beautiful.

It is my own.